wants to spend time with her folks, so I drove her and the kids to her parents' house, in central Pennsylvania, on Saturday. I have work I need to do in New York City, so I returned this evening by bus. As a consequence, I spent more time on Route 80 this weekend than I did in the kitchen. Trust me, the kitchen is a much better place to be.
Being with family got me to thinking. Lately, I’ve been trying to get everyone—all the kids, her, and myself—to sit and wait for everyone else to get to the table before eating. It’s something that’s important to me. A lot of work (cough, cough, ahem) goes into many of our meals, and I want to create a moment in which everyone enjoys them. Too often, the kids are hungry and they start eating, then Santa Maria will get up to check her phone, or I’ll go get my iPod for a Twitter update, and suddenly, the meal is over.
Before I left to come home this afternoon, Santa Maria said something to me that warmed my heart. “I like how you get the table set and how you get everyone to wait for everyone else before eating,” she said while we were taking a brief walk. I’m glad she gets it. Time is passing very quickly, and it’s good to make the most of every second. How do you get the meal started in your house? And any tips for keeping it going?
I’m 67 years old so of course I’m ancient and totally out of touch.;-)
Keep that in mind as I tell you that my mother would have been horrified if any of us started eating before everyone was seated. “Everyone” was 7 boys and 1 girl, my stepfather and her. When we were finished, we were also required to say, “May I be excused, please?”
Getting the meal to the table was my mother’s job; doing the dishes and cleaning up the kitchen was the job for my brother and me. Another ancient notion. 😉
From time-to-time with a 7-year-old we have to have that conversation about waiting for everyone before we start eating to be polite and shows respect to the cook (usually me). Mostly our son gets it and I recently overheard him tell his friend to wait to start eating until the grown ups sat down. We also have our son say a quick blessing (the standard, God is great, God is good and we thank God for our food, Amen) but we are probably unusual in that way.
My husband wasn’t raised with good table manners, everyone ate and ran at their house. I learned that the best thing was just to announce before Thanksgiving dinner that we’ll all wait to say the blessing and cheers to the cook and carver before we eat. In that case, it’s my 80’something-year-old mother-in-law who starts eating as soon as she is served!
Telling people what is expected and politely reminding them when they need that is a good rule of thumb with this one (as it is for many other things, too!).
Ah, Central Pennsylvania! It’s where I’m from and I am a bit envious I am not there right now. Love your blog – so many of your ideas I find incredibly helpful. I now always add an anchovie to my risottto. Such a great tip. And your sky high kale salad is the way I love to make kale.